Health

Well it seems that its the time of year that new things are about to start growing. Life is going to bloom and the seasons have changed.

St. Patricks day will never be the same. Today is the day I have decided i am going to follow my mothers footsteps and quit smoking. I am turning 30 years old in 7 days.

30 YEARS OLD!!!

I honestly didn't know what it would be like to be 30. Any time I thought about being 30, it was not this life I pictured. I ask myself why it is different and within seconds already know the answer.
I want that life...

As I look in my pack, I see 6 of them left. 6 cigarettes. 5 reasons I cannot run like i used to. (just lit one while I was writing this blog) 5 reasons that I cannot play my trumpet for as long. 5 reasons that my children will not have their father longer. 5 little cancer causing agents. 5 reasons my hands, clothes and breath smell like an ashtray. 5 reasons I wake up with crud in my lungs until I gag/choke/cough it out in the morning. I am so frickin over it. I unlike my mother will not use the reduce method. Once I set my mind to it, everyone knows it happens.
Tammy and I have both agreed we need to quit. She is mona jr as I have called her many times and will use the reduce method. I will cut it out like the cancer it causes. When these 5 are gone, my smoking habit will go with them.

Alexis and Daniel, I will live to see you graduate. I will live to see you marry. I will see you bring children into the world. I will not let my choice to be stupid and my lack of exercise be the reason you go without me.

I choose to get back my life from this curse that has plagued me since I stole the first one from my mom.

30 years old does not bring midlife crisis. It brings an eye opening realization of how selfish I've lived my life these past 30 years. It brings yet another year of growth and lastly, one more step to being a better father.

I love you kids.